Anyone else lose their childlike intuition too?

Ellipses… Issue #51

Ellipses… a small, special character. Used by writers to slow down, create a pause, and indicate thinking.

⚫️ 1 thought: Kids know what’s up. 🪶

Somewhere along the line, we lose the ability to recognize what we need. Or maybe that’s just me. But it took a mega long playdate for me to remember that we all have different limits, especially when it comes to social interactions.

To set the scene: My boys are 8 and 5, and there’s a set of siblings down the street who are the same age. We get them together oftenish. Usually we have to limit their joint playdates to 2 or 3 hours because someone cracks by then and we have to split them up.

But in this accidental mega playdate experiment, the kids hung out for much longer. So what changed? Did they magically mature and gel since the last time? (For those of you without knowledge of kids at this age, I applied heavy sarcasm to that last statement. The answer is a big fat no.)

At the start, the group started a yard party outside, complete with a bluetooth speaker and Spotify Kids. Marshmallo on repeat. They bounced between the trampoline and tree swing, and I observed from the house their happy squeals and healthy levels of sibling rivalry. They took turns coming inside to grab snacks or water. I was happy to see their owned autonomy.

But here’s where it gets cool. The little neighbor boy, who we’ll call Tommy, came in and asked for coloring supplies. An easy ask, because he could already see me journaling and doodling in my own notebook. I helped Tommy make a mini ‘zine and opened some air-dry clay for him to go wild. The art supply closet was his to explore.

From my observation, once Tommy was recharged and ready to rejoin the group, he happily got up and went outside.

This playdate lasted 5 magical hours. (A dream for a mom facing a solo-parenting weekend day.) And the kids were happy and vibed the whole time.

So here’s the thing. When we force ourselves to exist outside of our innate comfort zone, we throw tantrums. Especially if you’re a highly sensitive person/introvert/ADHD/whatever-you-want-to-call-it like me. Tantrums look different for everyone, especially if you’re 5 or 40, but they exist. For them, it’s throwing toys and becoming violent. For me, it’s fatigue and irritability and snacking to dull the senses.

But if we just stay present with ourselves and be mindful of our battery level, we create a much more sustainable existence for ourselves and those around us.

Five-year-old Tommy gets major props for his intuition and doing what his brain and body needed during that playdate, even if it meant stepping away from the group of kids for periods of time. He regulated himself (without even knowing he was doing so), and in turn he helped me recognize and remember this limited social battery trait about myself.

⚫️ 1 link: I wrote today for the first time in forever, and you can, too. 🔗

I didn’t have writer’s block per se. I think I didn’t write for the past few months because of perfectionism and fear and task paralysis. When I started working with my new therapist in the summer, she recommended Focusmate. Advertised it as the ADHD silver bullet.

Finally, the words swirled around my head so fast and so persistently that I had no choice but to write. Luckily, I remembered the Focusmate advice, and booked a 25 minute session. This newsletter poured out of me in that amount of time. And so—I can’t recommend FocusMate enough.

Try it today for sessions lasting 25 mins, 50, or 75 minutes, any time of the day, and get a virtual coworker for accountability and “body doubling” anywhere in the world. You get 3 free sessions per week, but once you see its magic you may want to upgrade.

⚫️ 1 journal prompt: Adult tantrums are real. 📔

What does your adult tantrum look like? Can you feel it coming? Can you mitigate it before it bursts? What do you need to prevent it?

(PS: I’m back on Instagram because I just can’t stay away, but now I’m mostly posting about analog journaling in my Travelers Notebook because I love it and I can’t stop won’t stop. Come say hi.)

Come say hi @hellobriostudio

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Either your attention span is impeccable or my newsletter was so compelling. Either way: you rock. Thanks! Hit reply or comment to continue the discussion. I always love to hear from you.

Be safe and well,

🖤 Jenny